tune out to tune in.

Why do some people meditate, or spend time with their God?

Besides the spiritual element, I believe there is a tangible outcome that such people find when 'tuning out' of the material world.

For myself, I find that water (and the soothing sound of it) can bring me to an inner place of calm.

There, ideas are liberated and can speak to me directly. Then I jot them down as fast as I can.

It frequently happens when I swim, shower or close my eyes next to a little creek (you only get artificial ones here in Singapore).

And I am thankful for finding this path to my deeper and more creative thoughts (especially since I shower every day).

This is perhaps the only time I will talk about this, lest I lose the connection by over-thinking and not being able to 'tune out'. It happens!

If it does, just step back and don't worry. Never worry.

All things said and done, are you taking the time to 'tune out'?

What restaurants say vs. What their customers think

Imagine you own a neat little restaurant. Or you might already do.

If you write that it is a well-kept secret, readers may think that it is far flung ('ulu' in Malay).

If you write that it is popular, readers may think it unwise to visit on a weekend (except for true-blue queueing Singaporeans).

If you write of a nice ambience, be sure to provide pictures whenever possible.

If you write nothing, you have an empty restaurant.

Knowing what to write (and how much) certainly takes some thought and skill. Most times, it requires an understanding of human behaviour.

Before you feed good food for their stomachs, you must first feed the right words into their heads.

a mixed bag.

If there is a universal truth about daily life - this might be it.

Forrest Gump said it, so have many others. For me, I liken life to a bag of Pick and Mix candies.

Sometimes, when we have a really bad day, we altogether ignore and discount the good things that did actually happen.

Some of us may even explain the good stuff away, no matter how happy we felt at the time.

Then, we are left with things that make us sulk as we slunk into bed and call it a day.

However when we dig into a bag of Pick and Mix candies, it is often the other way around.

Be it kids or adults, most of us dive straight for the candies we love (for me it is the sugar-coated sour apple worms).

At the end of the day, we are looking down at our own 'bag' of episodic encounters.

Why then do some of us dive straight at the things that upset us?

Pick the good moments and savour it.

Learn from the bad ones, and do not feel sorry for yourself.

It is your bag to Pick and Mix.

Reactors vs. Initiators

 

There are two types of people: reactors and initiators.

Faced with an unpleasant situation or person, reactors continue the interaction in the manner that was last concluded. For unpleasant encounters, this is where a vicious spiral begins. Matching the manner of response to which you had received it may seem equitable and logical – humans are wired to return a favour – but it can be a recipe for disaster if it is negativity that goes unchecked.

On the other hand, initiators are aware that everything they say or do, regardless of what followed before, can serve to effect positive change. Initiators are calm and assertive enough to prevent spontaneous emotions from getting in the way of their message. When on the receiving end of unpleasant words and actions, the initiator will say to the self that such behaviour “ends with me.” And it often does.

You would never participate in a relay holding a torch laced with spikes.

So why would you do that when it comes to conversations?